Although our government claims the law is meant to protect us, it is often used to violate our rights. Even worse, the state fails to protect us by not adequately punishing violent crimes. The government turns non-violent citizens who are not inflicting harm on anyone else into criminals and often throws them into prisons where they are at risk of being raped and killed. We waste resources tremendous resources on the War on drugs, which hinders are ability to prevent and punish actual crime. The solution is simple yet obvious: Those who harm others should be punished swiftly while those who do not should be left alone.
The War on Drugs is the greatest civil rights violation of our time. Individual users of drugs (save for some hard drugs) are unlikely to get prison terms for simple possession. However, they are still humiliated, arrested, and left with a criminal record that follows them for the rest of their life. This criminal record often prevents otherwise qualified candidates from getting jobs. Sometimes, a stable job is the one thing that can help drug-dependent individuals overcome their addiction. The War on Drugs also provides a perverse incentive for police officers. Under current laws they are allowed to seize any property that they believe was acquired through drug money. In every state but North Carolina, police can seize property before the victim is convicted, and in many cases even if the victim is never charged with a drug offense. A tool used to cripple drug cartels is now being used to deprive citizens of their private property rights. There are cases of police taking cars just because they found a joint in there.
The War on Drugs is even more draconian when it comes to its effect on suppliers of drugs. For providing a product that other people want, producers and suppliers are often rewarded with lengthy, sometimes even lifelong, prison sentences. Studies have shown that alcohol causes much more damage to society than any other drug.[1] Yet producers and suppliers are celebrated as contributors to our economy. Imagine the immorality of the state kidnapping the CEO of Anheuser Busch, or your local bartender, and throwing them in prison. That is exactly what we do to suppliers of a product that brings pleasure that people choose to partake in. It is not morally reconcilable to celebrate producers and suppliers of alcohol as contributors to our economy yet treat drug producers and suppliers as criminals.
Besides being morally wrong the drug war is impractical because it is so inefficient. The War on Drugs cost hardworking taxpayers like you over 51 billion dollars last year.[2] This diverts resources away from stopping actual crimes such as robbery, rape and murder. Next time your police department complains about being underfunded, think about all the money they waste on drug enforcement before you vote to raise taxes on yourself.
What could all these resources be used for? Perhaps stopping actual crimes, crimes where one person unjustly harms another person. About 39% of murders go unsolved.[3] Only about 25% of rape reports result in an arrest.[4] When the number of rapes that go unreported is taken into account, this number is truly dismal. Those people walk the streets among us. I understand police cannot solve every crime committed but they could solve a greater percentage if they didn’t spend so much money waging war against people because they disagree with their personal choices even though they harm no one but themselves. I do not want to minimize the harms caused by drugs in anyway. I don’t believe drugs should be legalized because they are harmless. I just lost a friend last Thursday due to a heroin overdose. Drugs do cause users harm, but as long as they are not hurting others, we should realize they are making bad choices, not committing crimes.
We have thousands of laws on the books. It should not be that complicated. Don’t steal, rape rob or murder. In general don’t hurt anyone else. If adult citizens want to make choices we need to let them. It is not our business telling other people how to live their lives. The war on drugs is worse than the harms created by drugs themselves. Let’s demand our government punish those who harm us, and allow those who don’t to live their lives freely.
[1] http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/11/01/alcohol.harm/
[2] http://www.drugpolicy.org/drug-war-statistics
[3] http://www.fbi.gov/ucr/cius2007/offenses/clearances/index.html
[4] http://www.3news.co.nz/Most-rapes-in-the-US-go-unreported-or-unsolved/tabid/417/articleID/129051/Default.aspx
You make a very bold and potentially controversial argument in the very first sentence of this essay which can run the risk of turning off your reader but you do a great job of backing it up with a concise and logical thesis that backs it up. You also do a great job of incorporating relevant and surprising statistics which force the reader to realize just how legitimate an argument your thesis may be. Easy to read but good argumentative tone as well.
You make a very bold and potentially controversial argument in the very first sentence of this essay which can run the risk of turning off your reader but you do a great job of backing it up with a concise and logical thesis that backs it up. You also do a great job of incorporating relevant and surprising statistics which force the reader to realize just how legitimate an argument your thesis may be. Easy to read but good argumentative tone as well.
I think your essay is really good. I think you should adjust your thesis to match your essay. Your essay is more about the war on drugs, but your thesis is about people not being punished adequately. I think if you changed your thesis to “people are not being punished adequately because of our extreme focus on the war on drugs” that would strengthen your essay. Also when you make statements like this: The War on Drugs is the greatest civil rights violation of our time, I think you should immediately back it up with facts or explain why it is such a big civil rights violation, because a lot of people would argue that it’s not.
Ben, your essay makes some reasonable claims about the potential downfalls of the war on drugs. Your tone creates a sense of identity with your writing and is used nicely to portray your stance on this issue. Your topic choice and essay structure are very good and put together well; however, I think you could develop your thesis a bit more and provide some more evidence as to how the War on Drugs will continue to negatively affect society (perhaps speculate the future conditions of the War on Drugs and provide a possible solution?). Overall a nicely written essay.
Your essay has a clear stance and your personal voice and emotional conviction to the piece are very evident. I liked all of the statistics and examples you used to show that the war on drugs is expensive and in your opinion, not worth it. It gives your opinion a factual backing. However, I think your essay would be more effective if you organized your argument in a clearer way. Perhaps being more decisive about the “topic sentences” in each paragraph and really presenting different perspectives (e.g. expanding upon why drug use should be regulated less—consequences of doing so). Especially in the paragraph where you talk about the harmful consequences of drug use, it could help to add more explanation in order for the reader to better understand how all of these pieces are supporting your overall argument.