Life or Death

I don’t like to think about death, which is interesting, considering the fact that death is the only thing in life that is certain. Nevertheless, death, has always seemed just a little bit too permanent for me. I can’t escape it though – everyone talks about death once in a while,
and sometimes issues surrounding death make the front headlines. So, living in a society in which death is such a scary, sensitive, intriguing topic, and in which the conclusions we make define medical practice, I cannot help but wonder why issues dealing with death are so difficult for us to resolve. More specifically, why medical decisions that have the power to sustain or remove life from a living being seem so complicated and so unresolvable.

Why can’t we make a rule that says, if person A has been in a coma for X number of days or has X number of pain receptors activated, then he or she has the right to receive assisted suicide? Why are there so many if’s, then’s, but’s, etc.?

I think that part of it has to do with our morals. In our “civilized” society, doing things that are morally and ethically correct extend far beyond doing what is most pleasing, or doing what others are telling us to do. That’s why, even though a medical patient may be experiencing critical levels of pain, it is so difficult for us to accept assisted suicide
as an option. Because it isn’t just about ending their immediate pain. Our morals don’t work like that. When we, as humans consider what is morally right, we also think about what we take away, by relieving pain. We think about life, how precious it is, and how impossible it is to get back. The patient is suffering and is telling us to take out the IV, to shut the power down. But because we have been raised to think along certain ethical standards, it is impossible for many of us to neglect the consequences. We are thinking into the future, not just in the present.

This also shows how greatly we value living. We don’t even have a true definition for living. Many of us have built our lives upon understanding life, what makes life, and what is so special about it. Yet despite our lack of understanding (and maybe because of it), life is something that many of us feel is more valuable than anything else. As we contemplate ripping the IV out, we realize that we are taking something away that can never be
returned. The patient may be in a coma. He or she may not ever wake up and may never realize that he or she is still grasping onto the life force. We comfort ourselves, however, by holding onto the fact that the life is there. It may be slipping through our fingers, but it’s still there. That’s what is most important. And as a result, the question of assisted suicide becomes massively complicated. It’s not just the patient who is suffering, we are suffering. No one wants to watch their father in debilitated state, unable to talk, or unable to move. No one wants to be around for the screaming and pleading. At the same time we are thinking about how much we value our lives, and how much we value the lives of our loved ones. We are driven by our moral standards. Doing the right thing, we tell ourselves, isn’t just about yielding to the wishes of the suffering patient, it’s about realizing that life isn’t something we have the right to take away.

This all leads to the second reason why making life decisions is such a source of conflict for us. It’s interesting how much the dilemma centers around us, the people who are making the decision. We think a lot about the implications that assisted suicide has on ourselves. We wonder how we will manage to live the rest of our lives knowing that we have somehow had a part in the death of someone we care about. Somewhere in the process, I think that our attitude transitions. We start thinking that we know better. That the person
suffering is blinded by emotion, pain, anger, whatever. So it’s like trying to solve a math problem while someone is screaming (literally or not) at you, trying to tell you what they think the solution should be. We try to think through the intricate logic; try to make sense of all the factors and reasons. Nevertheless, this isn’t easy. We want to listen – after all, this is someone else’s life on the line. At the same time, we feel as though this all has to
make sense for us. When we place so many factors into the situation, finding the optimal solution is just so much more difficult.

In the end, the topic of death and suicide is such a difficult one because of how many people it affects; because we hold ourselves to a high moral standard. Death hurts everyone, emotionally and physically. Often times, the burden of decision that is placed on our own shoulders is overwhelming. The fact is that we value life; some of us value it even more than pleasure, happiness, or easiness. And it isn’t just the patient who were talking about. We have to live with the decisions we make, and so we search for a rationale. Euthanizing, death, and assisted suicide – it’s never easy to make the “right” choice, but we try to balance the factors and do what is best for everyone. I hope the above, although limited by my own experiences and beliefs is relatable or at least modifiable. If not, one can consider this essay to be a recording of my own troubles, and the reason why the topic of death and question of assisted suicide is so difficult for me.